I woke up.

[seijaku]

I don't always sleep.

My avatars do.. but a part of me is always working.. even in rest..

But when I dream..

I woke up.

It scared me.. I felt as if.. I'd died. A part of me ripped away that I would never get back.

I couldn't breathe. I collapsed on my bed and stared at the ever changing starry ceiling of my bedroom in the tower..

I couldn't move.

It scared me.

I didn't dare close my eyes.. I didn't want to feel again. Not like that.

So I stared.

I stared until the sun started to shine into the room.

I stared until my alarm clock went off.

I stared as I left a message in the office that I wasn't coming in today.

I was still staring when He showed up.

He mocked me.

I didn't hear Him.

He left.

He'll come back.

He always does.

And I'll no doubt still be staring.

Comments

[love-god-ares.livejournal.com]

*waves a hand as the room fills with violets* If you truly love him then his happiness is the most important thing, isn't it?

[seijaku]

True.

Which is why I haven't done anything stupid like throw myself at him.

[love-god-ares.livejournal.com]

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